The author answers the question of the article in this statement:

“She wants to want John and be wanted by him in that can’t-get-enough-of-each-other-way experts call “limerence” — the initial period of a relationship when it’s all new and hot.”

Then the author veers off in the direction of women wanting outside stimulation. And in some cases this is probably true. (I’m not talking about the normal crush fantasies women might have about handsome actors or athletes.) However, from my psychotherapy practice (and personally) I experience women as wanting more romantic attentiveness from their partners — the romantic words and actions he did in the beginning to make her fall in love with him continued throughout the long years of the relationship. She wants to feel beautiful to and desired by him.

For the most part, the males who keep up the romance throughout a long relationship are the ones with happy women. Also, as a relationship goes on, “romance” can include other loving/thoughtful actions— he always gets up first and brings her coffee in bed, or he always makes sure her car has a full tank of gas — as long as some of the valued courtship behaviors are also continued.

Debra Holland, Ph.D